Dr. Woodard has been murdered, Sam is despondent, and Maggie (Kathryn Leigh Scott) is putzing around the house in the most outlandish outfit yet to grace Dark Shadows by 1967.
I showed this clip to a co-worker, who, rather than focus on Maggie’s Ohrbach’s-provided attire, expressed disappointment that Sam and Maggie were “normal people” (not vampires, ghosts, or whatever else she imagined Dark Shadows to be entirely composed of).
“That dress isn’t normal!” I decried. “Is it even a dress? I can’t tell if the seemingly velour top is connected to what appears at first glance to be a bedspread with a floral quilt pattern. Is it a floor-length skirt?”
I found Maggie’s choice of clothing for hanging around the house to be far more alarming than most of the supernatural phenomena on the Read the rest of this entry »
Tim Burton, please wave goodbye and promise to never come back.
Tim Burton has now successfully taken three of my cherished childhood œuvres d’art: Planet of the Apes, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and now Dark Shadows, and pissed his signature all over them. Dark Shadows is especially painful because I’ve recently re-discovered it as an adult and love it all the more.
I suppose the overlap in our mutual fondness for specific works demonstrates that we must share some of the same tastes, but only in nostalgia, not in re-creation. In fact, I would say for Tim Burton it’s less re-creation and more defecation. He’s got the money and the star power to run wild, which result in self-indulgent travesties that showcase The Tim Burton Experience™ but leave Read the rest of this entry »
A few months ago I noticed that Netflix was streaming the original Dark Shadows ABC daytime soap opera, no doubt coordinated with the release of the film adaptation set for May 2012. After a moment’s hesitation, I knew that I had to go back – return to my five-year-old self and confront one of my deepest fears: Barnabas Collins, the agent of many childhood nightmares that left an imprint of anxiety on my psyche that may have never been fully erased. I was about to conduct Read the rest of this entry »